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Feb. 2nd, 2022 09:55 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
intentional_lifei am feeling super frustrated about my journey of improvement. and im aware that its coming from a perfectionistic issue im feeling. back on november first identified that im on my year of wellness my year of improvement. and for about a month and a half i was feeling really great.i joined the gym i was feeling great. but a series of events FUCKED ME UP. i got a bladder infection, i am pretty sure i got covid and was sick for a month, my grandmother passed away, i got into a big fight with my partner, i felt overwhelmed, my best friend at work switched jobs leaving me to work on my own.
i wanted november first to be this seamless 365 day journey of shedding weight and getting fit and getting mentally and spriritually PERFECT. gosh even writing it out is RIDICULOUS. I was pretty great about not falling into my perfectionistic tendencies for that first month and half as i navigated my bladder infection and other smaller items but getting SICK made me feel SO BAD. i was feeling so overwhelmed.
analytically speaking i was aware that it actually potentiated so much for me. THE CHAOS ALLOWED FOR ORGANIZATION. i understand that. but when i think about going forward and doing this health journey im feleing stuck on creating a seamless plan. i want a picture perfect journey. i want perfect. god this perfectionism is so god damn annoying cuz i know NOTHING CAN BE SEAMLESS AND PERFECT. THATS BULLLLSHIT.
i know this. i need to work thru this.
yesterday was 2/1 so im three months into my year with 9 months remaining till 11/1 and i have ALOT THAT I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH. ALOT. JESUS CHRIST.
i need to embrace this imperfection and im a little stuck on how.
i wanted november first to be this seamless 365 day journey of shedding weight and getting fit and getting mentally and spriritually PERFECT. gosh even writing it out is RIDICULOUS. I was pretty great about not falling into my perfectionistic tendencies for that first month and half as i navigated my bladder infection and other smaller items but getting SICK made me feel SO BAD. i was feeling so overwhelmed.
analytically speaking i was aware that it actually potentiated so much for me. THE CHAOS ALLOWED FOR ORGANIZATION. i understand that. but when i think about going forward and doing this health journey im feleing stuck on creating a seamless plan. i want a picture perfect journey. i want perfect. god this perfectionism is so god damn annoying cuz i know NOTHING CAN BE SEAMLESS AND PERFECT. THATS BULLLLSHIT.
i know this. i need to work thru this.
yesterday was 2/1 so im three months into my year with 9 months remaining till 11/1 and i have ALOT THAT I WANT TO ACCOMPLISH. ALOT. JESUS CHRIST.
i need to embrace this imperfection and im a little stuck on how.
